too long a time

This is how I've been feeling for too, too long...I found this in the "First Person" series on page 67 of the February 2000 print version of Life magazine; John Trotter is the author.

I struggle each day to find that once familiar person, me, closest companion. I've lost so much precious time. It's been rolling over me like a river in a nightmare, having neither length nor brevity.

The waters… tangled me in a dark eddy of lonely struggle, apart from the world, where time hardly seemed to exist at all, even as it flowed past me. But as my awareness has gradually risen…

I see that my loved ones, my friends, the rest of the world, have gone a long way down that river without me.